An encouraging trend in youth ministry over the last 5-10 years has been the growth of contemplative practices in youth ministry. one of the real pioneers in this in the usa has been mark yaconelli who developed and ran the youth ministry and spirituality project for 7 years. the question he wanted to explore was what would happen if you took youth groups in a range of denominations and worked to introduce them to ways of contemplative prayer. would this have any transformative effect? the results were dramatic… youth ministers and young people that learned how to pray were transformed.

mark has written a book contemplative youth ministry (which has just been published in the uk) in which he shares his insights and approach. it is a wonderful book. if you are involved in youth ministry you must get it. i actually think you should get it and read it if you are in any kind of leadership in church. this isn’t really another model to buy off the shelf as the latest quick fix solution which is probably the last thing we need. it goes much deeper than that.

mark says that

contemplation is being with god within the reality of the present moment. contemplation is about presence. it’s about attentiveness, opening our heart’s eye to god, ourselves, and others. contemplation is an attitude of the heart, an all embracing hospitality to what is…

and so contemplative youth ministry is simply being with god, and learning to be attentive to god’s presence in the lives of young people. mark suggests that youth ministry needs to slow down.

i have observed too many churches and youth ministries who embody a sense of urgency that communicates a god who is either a relentless taskmaster or completely incompetent… this is the endless parade of duded up rock stars, hyperactive activities, word heavy programmes… there is a tangible sense that god must be dressed up or hidden behind high energy music, and charismatic speakers. our churches and ministries seem to be deathly afraid of any kind of downtime. all silence and stillness is eradicated for fear that young people might find god disappointing, boring or absent. it’s as if our church and ministry leaders have an anxious suspicion that god has left the building and so they stall with jabbering words and meaningless activities in the hope that the crowd won’t become restless. in contrast jesus isn’t afraid of doubts, or downtime or disappointment or boredom – in fact i might even claim that he finds doubt, boredom and disappointment critical to spiritual growth! … jesus asks us to stop, he invites us to come away to quiet and deserted places. he asks us to be still and know. he calls us to take a moment to do nothing. he calls us to turn our attention away from our anxiety and busyness and just simply notice the work god is already doing.

the book is full of encouraging stories and it’s very practical. as well as outlining some specific practices of prayer mark suggests how to help a church start from scratch to build a youth team, help that team learn to practise discerning god’s presence and voice in their midst, and then to begin to introduce that attentiveness to god’s presence with the young people. this includes a simple outline for running meetings mark devised called a liturgy of discernment that looks very easy to use but shifts the emphasis of planning quite significantly. the last section uses a threefold approach taken from spiritual direction as a framework for working with young people – noticing (helping young people become aware of their experience of god), naming (helping them find a language to describe it), and nurturing (helping young people develop practices that deepen their understanding and relationship with god). the journey is as much about us changing and learning to pray and be attentive as it is about the young people.

if you think this is a consumer choice or personality type thing i.e. your young people won’t be into it, don’t dismiss it so quickly. it’s really not about stopping having fun and just engaging in prayer and being serious all of a sudden…

the purpose of integrating contemplative presence in youth ministry is not to form kids into monks, nor is it to make us experts in contemplative prayer – it is to deepen our (youth and adults) awareness of god and others and self so that we might become fully alive.

what is encouraging about the stories and process that mark used in the youth ministry and spirituality project and written about here is that the churches that used this are not your uber cool ones. they sound like bog standard denominational set ups, in some cases with no youth ministry to speak of. and from the descriptions those with a call to get involved with young people don’t need to be young and cool themselves.

this complements other books such as tony jones soul shaper, jenny baker and moya ratanyake’s tune in chill out and kenda creasy dean’s practising passion. together these are opening up a very hopeful way forward for youth ministry. i think it especially opens up very hopeful possibilities for youth ministry in traditional and denominational settings. it has sometimes felt as though the only way offered to do radical stuff with young people has been to get them into charismatic worship where they experience god. that is transformative for some groups but problematic for others. there are lots of traditions and groups of young people for whom that just isn’t what they are looking for or going to get into or it cuts them off from their tradition. it may also be for more charismatic groups that this will open up whole new possibilities as well.

This book review was written by Jonny Baker: Contemplative Youth Ministry

The central problem in sharing the Christian faith with young people doesn’t concern words; it’s deeper than that. The real crisis facing those of us who seek to share faith with youth is this:
we don’t know how to be with our kids.
we don’t know how to be with ourselves.
we don’t know how to be with God.
 pp19

Contemplative Youth Ministry is a book that’s been a long coming, a result of the Youth Ministry and Spirituality Project (http://www.ymsp.org) which has been facilitated by Mark Yaconelli.

For 8 years the YMSP put together research, articles, conferences and retreats for church communities and youth workers engaging people with contemplative practices, prayer and ministry. Mark has compiled much of the lessons from the project and placed them into this fantastic book so that others may also engage with the project and the opportunities that contemplative practices may offer their ministry.

I’ve been a fan of books by Kenda Creasy Dean and Dorothy Bass that have been encouraging youth ministry to explore the benefits of spiritual and contemplative practices, and have found that their writing have benefited and challenged my ministry with young people over the last few years, yet find that their work is not as widely read here in Australia as I’d like. This book I hope will break into those networks and ministries that haven’t paid much attention to the challenges of other authors to explore contemplative practices in ministry and open their eyes and minds to the benefits of such practices in ministry with young people.

What I like about this book is that it’s written partially as a text book for leaders as well as providing some practical input as to how leaders can learn some of the practices that are spoken about in the book. This isn’t about teaching people how to get their young people to participate in contemplative practices, it’s about sharing stories and exploring ways in which people’s youth ministry may benefit from contemplative practices.

One of the key learning points for me included Mark’s exploration into what I believe to be the root problem behind most youth ministries, that they’re more about addressing either adult’s fears and anxieties for young people or the fears and anxieties that young people have of the church.

adult anxiety about teens may be the primary reason youth ministry exists.
pp31

That if youth ministry is about addressing the anxiety that adults have about young people then it’s about control, about developing good morals, about teaching people how to act and believe. Youth ministries like this develop discipleship models and become restrictive and deadening.

The other direction that many youth ministries take is to address the fears that young people have of the church. Ministries that focus on these fears will tend to focus on entertaining young people, trying to address the fear that “church is boring” they also distract young people from the deeper rhythms of the Christian faith.

Mark continues the exploration into anxieties and shares some stories and lessons learnt from discussions with parents of young people asking exactly why many adults see the need to take their children to church. The suggestion being that parents really want their children to be alive, to know the presence and reality of God, although their expectations tend to lean towards learning morality and how to conform to the life of the community.

It’s difficult for parents to trust their children to God. Look what happened to Jesus! Look what happened to the disciples! Look what happened to his friends, those we point to as saints! Parents, church members, and youth might want Christian values and assurances, but we don’t want the life of Jesus. 
pp42

Mark continues his book to explore the benefit of contemplative prayer, not only as a part of one’s spiritual life and being present with God, but also as a way for people to learn to simply be present with the young people that they minister with. As we learn to practice contemplative prayer so we learn to practice contemplative youth ministry, as he writes that contemplative prayer doesn’t move people into more silence, but instead into more authentic action.
The gifts that contemplative practices encourages in us naturally feed into our ministry with young people, allowing us to learn to just be present, to truly see the young people that we’re working with, to really be able to listen to them, to build a ministry of nurture and most of all to learn just to be present with those who have learnt that they will never get an adult’s full attention.

As I read the New Testament it’s clear to me that people felt seen by Jesus. It’s also clear that Jesus’ willingness to openly see people (particularly those who often went unseen and unnoticed) was at the heart of his ministry.
pp106
What’s so special about this book is that it’s telling us stuff that we already know to be true, i mean we allready know that young people are looking for adults who know how to live lives of love, but we still find it difficult to live it. Mark has written in a way that inspires us to take it on and be energized about altering our approach to our ministry with young people, our own personal spiritual journey and the way in which we see, nurture, notice and be with young people and with each other.

This is a youth ministry resource that needed to be written and needs even moreso to be read, I’m hoping that what we’ll see out of this is a number of youth ministries being revitalized, a number of youth workers being inspired, a number of churches being transformed and a number of young people with a new generation of ministries that is all about introducing them to the deeper rhythms and practices of the Christian faith, and the alternative life that Jesus calls each of us towards.

What does a contemplative approach to youth ministry look like? It looks like youth engaged in centering prayer as well as body surfing. It look like kids doing lectio divinia as well as critical study of the bible. It looks like solitude as well as service projects, contemplative worship as well as disco karaoke. As Jesus points out again and again, it’s not the method but the spirit – the love and awareness behind our activities – that make them Christian.
pp232

Mark Yaconelli has released his long awaited a book titled contemplative youth ministry.

It is a wonderful book.

If you are involved in youth ministry you should get it.

Actually, I think you should get it and read it if you are in any kind of leadership in church.

This isn’t really another model to buy off the shelf, nor is it the latest quick fix solution (which is a good thing because probably the last thing we need is a quick fix solution). It goes much deeper than that.

He has found the time to answer a handful of the questions that I sent him re his latest book Contemplative Youth Ministry, a special thanks to Mark for providing these answers and the book, which I think offers a lot to the international dialogue on youth ministry

a) you, and many others have come under some suspicion from a number of people who compare contemplative approaches to prayer with eastern mysticism citing it as non-christian, how have you engaged with these people and criticisms? (note that i think many of their questions are unfortunately coming from what I’m calling a western mysticism that is based around a blessing theological view of ministry and prayer)

Mark: I’ve faced questions like this for ten years. People continue to post websites attacking me on this issue…what amazes me is that I’ve never been contacted by any of these people. How can they be Christians and not confront me, hold me accountable, if they really think I’m doing something that’s destructive to Christians?

In answer to your question. It’s difficult for people to recognize that silence is neutral. Silence is a human capacity that can be good, bad or trivial. If a Buddhist monk stood on a street corner and began preaching about Buddhism would we call him a Christian because he was using the traditional Christian practice of “preaching?” Some people feel that because contemplative prayer invites silence, stillness, and meditation that it somehow makes you part of another religion. The important thing to focus on in any Christian practice (even preaching or teaching or studying or other traditional Christian practices) is the “intention” and “attention” of the person practicing. In Christian forms of contemplative prayer we draw our attention to the God of Jesus Christ. Our intention is to make ourselves as vulnerable as we can be to the God of Jesus Christ. Jesus is concerned with the direction of our hearts. The practices themselves can be used for good or bad (look at the religious leaders in Jesus’ day. They were highly moral people who new their scriptures and yet their hearts were closed to the presence of God.) Jesus continually goes off in solitude and silence to commune with God. We are told in the some to “meditate on our beds at night” and to “Be still and know.” Any growing relationship with God requires not only our activity and words but also a willingness to listen and watch and wait. This is contemplative prayer, a willingness to listen to the One who names and claims us.

b) how long in the making was this book?

Mark: I first began writing this book in 1998. I wrote five chapters between 1998-99 and then realized I didn’t know enough. In 2001, I wrote another three chapters. I submitted all of these chapters to publishers in 2004 to secure a contract. Once I had a book contract I set the book aside for six months. Then during a year long sabbatical with my family I sat down to write and the book flowed out in three months. I used only 1 chapter from my original writings in 1998, 99 and 2001. I’m glad I waited. If I’d used earlier chapters the book would’ve been much more eager about scoring points for contemplation and demeaning other approaches to the Christian life.

c) what’s the most important lesson that you’ve learnt from the process of working on this project?

Mark: One of the most significant things I’ve learned is that people don’t feel like they have permission to be spiritual leaders, spiritual guides. The calling that ministers feel is to know God, commune with God and then accompany the Holy Spirit in helping other people to awaken to the presence and love of God. As people begin to serve in the ministry, this calling is somehow set aside. People suddenly feel that their job is to administrate programs, engage in psychological counseling and learn how to become good educators. They set aside their calling to be spiritual guides and seek to become family counselors, efficient administrators and teachers. These are good skills and roles to play in ministry, but they aren’t the central calling.

The central calling is to be a spiritual guide. To be a spiritual guide you need to spend regular time in the Spirit. You need time in solitude, in prayer, in study. You need to know how to listen, how to see the work of God in the midst of chaos or routine. You need to be vulnerable to suffering and have a keen ear for spiritual restlessness. There are different skills, different forms of study and preparation when you see yourself as a spiritual guide. In my work with churches I had pastors and youth leaders keep journals of their experience in integrating contemplative prayer and ministry. As I read their journals the one word that kept popping up was “permission.” I feel like I’ve finally been given permission to be a spiritual leader.

d) do you think that program based resources like those from youth specialties may have had an effect of encouraging people from a more contemplative based ministry to one that is continually program based? Do you think it’d be helpful to go back on a number of program based resources to write up a contemplative ministry resource for them all?

Mark: One of the misunderstandings of contemplative youth ministry is that the goal is to make kids candle-loving monks. Prayer, solitude and silence are necessary for a Christian life but the results of prayer and listening is that we know better how to act, how to engage, how to serve and befriend others. In one church that I worked with as the adult leaders spent more time listening and waiting on God in the midst of young people what they began to discern was that their kids were over scheduled, stressed out, and burdened with expectations. Through prayer and listening they began to hear that the best way to communicate the life and freedom of Jesus was to let-go of some of the heavy times of Bible study and worship and instead take the kids bowling.

So. Do we need to throw out the old fun and games approach to youth ministry? I would say “no.” We need to be more discerning of when fun and games are needed, when silence and prayer are needed, when teaching and study is needed. We need to be more attentive to the spirit so that our programs are more responsive to the needs of youth and the guiding of the Holy Spirit. What helps us to be attentive to God and young people. For me, I’ve found that listening forms of prayer, in the community of others, helps us to be more discerning of God’s call and leading. That’s contemplative youth ministry.

e) if you were to help a church put together a job specification for a youth pastor/worker, how would it look when using some of the themes and ideas formed in your book?

Mark: Here’s what comes to me off the top of my head…

Then I would create a job description (if it were a full-time position) that would require the youth ministry to take one day a week for Sabbath (prayer, reading, solitude, silence, walks outside, good food with friends, etc.). I’d also ask the youth worker to meet regularly with a spiritual director or other spiritual mentor. Someone who the youth director could talk to about their spiritual life and ministry.

f) one of the things i’m really interested in is how your book continually suggests people to develop ministries that are contextual, that form out of a community of young people rather than mimicking those ministries of other churches, in part i was hearing a similar thing to that of emerging-type-churches who are trying to do a similar process. do you think that the contemplative approach to ym could also be transferred to a contemplative approach to ministry, and how much do you think things would need to change to do so?

Mark: Yes. What we discovered in our research was a contemplative approach to ministry. It just happens that our study and my background is in youth ministry, but the principles, practices and processes can transfer to any form of ministry.

g) if you were to put together a mix tape of your favourite 10 songs to listen to while driving what would they be?

Mark: I’m not good with song titles…but it would include music from Iron and Wine, Ryan Adams, Son Volt, Bob Dylan, Billie Holiday, Django Reinhardt, Duke Ellington, Stephen Grapally (sp?), and maybe the early Police records.

h) if you were to put together a list of the 5 most helpful texts in your ministry with young people what would they be?

Mark: Psalm 139

Baptism stories from Mark and Luke,

Luke 15 parables

Romans 8

Matt. 11:28-30

Isaiah 55

John 15 (particularly verse 15)

1 John 4 (particularly 7-21)

Did I go over my allotted verses?

i) what makes you anxious?

Mark: My children. The find everything that is unhealed in me and draw it to the surface. Every time I return home from leading a retreat and feel like I’ve got some spiritual mojo…all I need to do is step into my house and encounter my three, beautiful children and within moments I’m human, anxious, upset, unsettled and uncertain of my own skills as a parent.

j) what are you currently reading?

Mark: The Dark Night of the Soul by Gerald May. God Laughs and Plays by David James Duncan and Hidden Oregon Where Vacations Meet Adventures (We’re planning our vacation).

Interview provided by Darren Wright

Jamie wants to be the real thing. From the roots of her dyed blonde hair There are a lot of things Jamie hates about her life: her dark hair, her dads Stone Age Charter of Curfew Rights, her real name  Jamilah Towfeek. For the past three years Jamie has hidden her Lebanese background from everyone at school. Its only with her email friend John that she can really be herself. But now things are getting complicated: the most popular boy in school is interested in her, but there’s no way he would be if he knew the truth.

Then there’s Timothy, the school loner, who for some reason Jamie just cant stop thinking about. As for John, he seems to have a pretty big secret of his own To top it all off, Jamie’s school formal is coming up. The only way shell be allowed to attend is by revealing her true identity. Will she risk it all? And does she know who she is Jamie or Jamilah?

Another book i’ve read recently is 10 Things I Hate About Me by Randa Abdel-Fattah, its a great book to follow on from her last novel Does My Head Look Big In This? 10 Things follows the life of Jamilah, a Lebanese girl who has, for quite some time now hidden her real identity from her friends at school for fear of them attaching any number of racist stereotypes to her and her family, so now with blonde hair and blue eyes Jamilah lives her school life as Jamie.

As this year goes on its becoming increasingly difficult for Jamilah to hide her identity from those that are close to her, and shes beginning to ask some serious questions about the friendships that she once thought important and those which she once thought unimportant. She also has to deal with family life, her cultural identity and the feeling that almost any young woman I know has, that her father just does not understand her.

Quite simply a beautiful book, truly Australian, etched in our history as the book begins with people talking about the riots in Cronulla in 2006, 10 Things is more than a coming of age story, its about identity, family, friendship, self awareness, confidence, of learning to be ones self without any fear of retribution.



Id recommend this book to any young person, particularly females aged 13+, I enjoyed reading the book and Im 31!

Book Information:

Title: Ten Things I Hate About Me
Author: Randa Abdel-Fattah
Reading level: Young Adult
Publisher: Orchard Books (May 1, 2010)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0545050561
ISBN-13: 978-0545050562

My Rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars

I have several copies of this book on my book shelf. I used to have many more, but, over the years I’ve given them out to young people with the words “pass this on to a friend or someone else when you’ve finished reading this” written in the front cover. And, when I see some copies of this book in a “for sale” bin I usually grab them all up so I can pass more on to others to read.

This was written back in 2003 and is a God-send.

Dr Phil Daughtry (PhD) is the head of the Youth Work faculty at Tabor College, South Australia. Phil’s specialty is the spiritual & professional formation of new youth workers & the dialogue between Christian spirituality & contemporary society and professional life.

He has written this book as a short, easy-to-read, down to earth and authentic “guide” for young Christians, in it he shares his beliefs, struggles and thoughts on a wide variety of issues including reading the bible, creating sacred space, prayer, vocation, sexual love, love, relationships, sexuality, church and much more. In approaching these issues he tries not to dumb things down, but to intelligently raise the issues in a way that he’s not telling you what to think but instead is trying to engage the reader in a sort of discussion.

I’ve been particularly impressed with the way that he talked through sex and sexuality, using the grace, wisdom and honesty that I guess he’s learned to live with over many years in youth ministry and relationship with people who have also been honest and wise around him.

I’ve also passed this book on to older people, elders and mentors within communities with the idea that they may learn something from the way that Phil explores and discusses his own faith. Don’t agree with him because I’ve given you this book, but instead learn from the way that he is honest and authentic in his dialogue about these issues and his faith.

In this way the book is a mentor’s guide to sharing one’s faith with others. I can only imagine how good this book would be to read as a parent(s) with one’s child when they’re between 13 and 18.

One of the more helpful things about this book is that it’s short… very short, at only 118 pages he’s managed to put together a handbook that is very readable and not frightening to the average or non-average person (young or old).

This is one of the best books to be released from Australia’s Youth Ministry “community” a must read, and a must-hand-over-to-others-to-read book.

Don’t believe me?

Read what other people have said about the book:

This is the best book to come out in this area for the last decade in the region. – Fuzz Kitto, Spirited Consultancy

I found myself cheering along the way, laughing out loud a lot – which is not something I generally do when reading ‘religious’ stuff…
 – Linda MacQueen,Editor,Lutheran Church Australia magazine




It deals with the big issues that young people face regularly in a pastoral and biblical manner. It is very readable and uses good humour for a young person who doesn’t read much.
 – Andrew Menzies, State Youth Director and Youth Ministry lecturer, South Australian Baptist Union and Burleigh Theological College


Phil Daughtry’s significant youth ministry experience and practical approach shines though this very easy and enjoyable read. He approaches a range of issues from prayer to church membership to sexuality with sensitivity, openness and a great sense of humour. Young people find this book “funny” which is not what you would usually expect from this kind of offering. It is certainly not “preachy” or typically conservative. – Bruce Mullan, Director of the Youth and Children’s Ministry Unit, Uniting Church in Australia, Synod of Queensland




Phil Daughtry has written a book that, in my opinion, should be read by everyone! So many books on spirituality impose burdens on people that make living a spiritual life seem hard and dry. Phil Daughtry’s approach is just the opposite. It is fresh, sensible, realistic, and contemporary. Phil’s concern for youth and their relationship with God and others shines through on every page in an engaging, and sometimes humorous, style that is a pleasure to read. – Steve Parker, The Thinking Christian’s website

Phil what an amazing book, it should be compulsory reading for all youth workers and young Christians (actually make that all Christians)…
 – Peter Hobson, Sydney UCA Youth Worker and Ordination Candidate

Book Details:

Title: The Sacred Life of Us

Author: Phil Daughtry

Published: 2003

Publisher: Open Book Publishers

ISBN 0 85910 967 4

My Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

The Grief book by Elizabeth Vercoe and Kerry Abramowski is an absolutely stunning collection of stories, helpful tips, tricks, rituals and strategies for young people dealing with grief.

From instructions to help young people find a suitable person to talk to about their grief to providing rituals to sharing helpful tips about what people do at funerals Elizabeth asks many key questions about the nature of grief, how people may deal with it and what some “good tricks” might be for young people who are grieving.

The book is humorous, easy to read, helpful, open and most importantly is aimed at providing young people with a tool for them to deal with their own grief.

While this book is not necessarily Christian it really needs to be read by youth workers, ministers, parents and most importantly by young people… It’s a unique book with a beautiful message and an honest nature.
From the back of the book:

“A unique and compassionate guide, which gives people struggling with grief and loss the tools they need to work through their grief. Above all, Elizabeth Vercoe and Kerry Abramowski let young people know that even in their darkest hour they are not alone. It seems as though society has hoodwinked many into believing ‘time heals all wounds’, which is untrue. Time just passes – it takes actions to heal your heart.”
- Dr Michael Carr-Gregg Phd MAPS, Adolescent Psychologist, Founder CanTeen

Book Information:
Title: The Grief Book
Author(s): Elizabeth Vercoe, Kerry Abramowski
Publisher: Black Dog Books
Date Published: 9/03/2004
ISBN: 1 876372 52 4
APN: 9781876372521
Purchase from Black Dog Books

My Rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars

A Generation Alone, a primer on Generation X, by Bill Mahedy and Janet Lea Bernardi, was published in 1994 by InterVarsity Press, one of the first books to address generational change from a Christian perspective.

In 1994 William P. Mahedy was a college chaplain and young adult pastor for the Episcopal Church in San Diego. He had a background working as a chaplain with Vietnam Veterans. Janet Lea Bernardi was coordinator of campus & young adult ministries for Episcopal Church in San Diego, with a background in biochemistry and continuing medical research at the University of California. If anybody knows what they’re doing now, let me know! All I know is that Bill is a retired military chaplain living in San Diego.

Post Traumatic Generational Stress

In A Generation Alone, Bill draws on his experience as a veteran of the Vietnam war to examine the effects of generational trauma, including spiritual numbness and distorted images of God. One comment caught my attention. Many, because of shattered self-esteem, understand sin and guilt not in their classical Biblical sense but as a personal judgment on them by others.

Post traumatic stress disorder is an enduring condition resulting from stressful incidents beyond the normal range of human experiences. These could include combat, terrorism, genocide, torture, rape, violence, and devastating natural disasters. Generational cohorts coming of age in the middle of war experiences would be marked by brittleness, a survivor mentality, with serious moral and religious questions. During crisis, Mahedy tells us, the only priority is survival. Dealing with emotional responses – sorrow, grief, guilt, anger – is buried or repressed. In the wake of the crisis survivors may experience disturbing dreams, flashbacks, sleep disorders, violent behaviour, depression and emotional numbing. They may have feelings of detachment from others find themselves unable to feel loving towards others.

Trauma survivors are forced to engage with questions of meaning that others may never even consider. “Why did God allow this?” “What did I do to deserve this?” Evil becomes real and personal. Youthful illusions of omnipotence are shattered. Vulnerability becomes a permanent feature of consciousness.

Mahedy makes the connection between his work with Vietnam veterans and the members of Generation X he encounters on campus. He sees widespread problems with students struggling to develop a sense of stability and self-image. Young adults content with constant feelings of emptiness, depression, suicidal thinking, fear of the future, and lack of hope.

A key to the generational angst, Bernardi observes, is the experience of “aloneness”, resulting from abandonment and alienation. The alienated may seem fully engaged with others, but somehow portray a flatness of spirit in their relationships. This generation, the authors say, has grown up without their parents’ moral guidance and concern for spiritual wellbeing. The parental divorce rate is double that faced by the Boomers at the same age.

Post Traumatic Generational Stress

In A Generation Alone, Bill draws on his experience as a veteran of the Vietnam war to examine the effects of generational trauma, including spiritual numbness and distorted images of God. One comment caught my attention. Many, because of shattered self-esteem, understand sin and guilt not in their classical Biblical sense but as a personal judgment on them by others.

Post traumatic stress disorder is an enduring condition resulting from stressful incidents beyond the normal range of human experiences. These could include combat, terrorism, genocide, torture, rape, violence, and devastating natural disasters. Generational cohorts coming of age in the middle of war experiences would be marked by brittleness, a survivor mentality, with serious moral and religious questions. During crisis, Mahedy tells us, the only priority is survival. Dealing with emotional responses – sorrow, grief, guilt, anger – is buried or repressed. In the wake of the crisis survivors may experience disturbing dreams, flashbacks, sleep disorders, violent behaviour, depression and emotional numbing. They may have feelings of detachment from others find themselves unable to feel loving towards others.
A Generation Alone, by Bill Mahedy and Janet Lea Bernardi, was published in 1994 by InterVarsity Press. This was one of the first books to address generational change from a Christian perspective. In 1994 William P. Mahedy was a college chaplain and young adult pastor for the Episcopal Church in San Diego. He had a background working as a chaplain with Vietnam Veterans. Janet Lea Bernardi was coordinator of campus & young adult ministries for Episcopal Church in San Diego, with a background in biochemistry and continuing medical research at the University of California. If anybody knows what they’re doing now, let me know! All I know is that Bill is a retired military chaplain living in San Diego

A Generation Alone, a primer on Generation X, by Bill Mahedy and Janet Lea Bernardi, was published in 1994 by InterVarsity Press, one of the first books to address generational change from a Christian perspective.

In 1994 William P. Mahedy was a college chaplain and young adult pastor for the Episcopal Church in San Diego. He had a background working as a chaplain with Vietnam Veterans. Janet Lea Bernardi was coordinator of campus & young adult ministries for Episcopal Church in San Diego, with a background in biochemistry and continuing medical research at the University of California. If anybody knows what they’re doing now, let me know! All I know is that Bill is a retired military chaplain living in San Diego.

Generation X and its place in history, its destiny

Mahedy and Bernardi observe that Generation X in the United States was raised on the rubble of a “New Jerusalem” – the American dream of prosperity as ‘divine right’. This was the first wave to reach adulthood in the post-industrial or information age.

The authors provide a critique of Strauss and Howe’s theory of generational cycles in which Gen X (or 13th Gen) has developed as a reactive cohort responding to idealist Boomers. The Millennials, according to Strauss and Howe, are the new civic generation. The theory is that the Millennials will benefit from both the Xers desire to give better parenting than they received, and from Boomers conversion from narcissists into concerned midlife parents.

The authors point out that the Strauss and Howe theories have not taken into account the unprecedented rapidly accelerating pace of global, multicultural, interdependent technological civilisation. There is no evidence that the Boomers have undergone conversion from narcissism, immorality, self interest or greed. The social and moral pathology inflicted on Gen X is progressive – worse in younger cohorts. Mahedy and Bernardi wonder if Gen Xers will have enough emotional capacity to spend energy on parenting?

Another major factor changing the generational cycle is the monumental move from modernism to postmodernism. Science has been altered by twentieth century quantum physics. Political, economic and social systems are becoming more complex. The global village is now a reality.

Gen Xers cannot expect to achieve the economic success attained by parents, largely because of the broad changes in economy. Both parents need to work to support their family. There is a widening gap between rich and poor. The industrial system is downsizing and decentralising. Moral decay, linked with selfishness, is being revealed in the dominant American preoccupation with wealth and image.

Xers had the capacity to be prophets of hope to a struggling society. They were strengthened by both their embrace of suffering and their sense of humility and aloneness. Young Christians have the opportunity to “go beyond Constantine” – to find ways of being church without the Christendom position of privilege. They would need to find alternatives to privatised atheist secularism on one hand and enforced fundamentalism on the other.

Mahedy and Bernardi provide sweeping generalisations on Generation X, largely based on their observations of young adults they are encountering on University campus. In addition, Mahedy’s lenses are clearly affected by his work with the survivors of Vietnam. Their observations have been backed up by my colleagues in youth ministry who have remarked on how difficult it is to find psychologically healthy volunteers. Discipleship of young adults has needed to focus on recovery before moving towards mobilisation.

Book Details:

Author: Bill Mahedy and Janet Lea Bernardi
Publisher: Intervarsity Pr (July 1, 1994)
ISBN: 0830816968

Review By: Duncan Mcleod is a Mission consultant for the Queensland Synod of the UCA. Duncan originally wrote this review over at his blog Postkiwi.

Kristoffer Cox published his book, Gen X and God, in 1998. At the time of writing he was 30 years old, a former Air Force officer in his final year at Luther Seminary, St Paul, Minnesota. His goal in writing was to present an outline of the basic gifts of the Christian faith in manner understandable and inviting to Gen Xers. (see Jeff Favre’s story at The Lutheran at the time of publication. This is not primarily a book about Gen X, as much as an exploration of Lutheran understandings of Christian good news for Gen Xers. Cox lays his material together in a way that allows for personal reflection, discussion and perhaps even feedback. Having said that, Cox does start off with a description of the context in which his generation are finding their way. Part of that reality is the need to express the gospel in ways that connect with current concerns and aspiration.

He quotes Robert George, writing in “Stuck in the Shadows with You: Observations on Post-Boomer Culture”, Generations Apart: Xers vs Boomers vs The Elderly:

“The problem Boomers have with the generation that came right after them is what anyone would have upon suddenly noticing that their shadow was talking back to them.The attitude that typifies our generation is resistance to, independence from, and a rejection of Boomer cultural ‘values’. Our generation is the one that will utter the truths that Boomers don’t want to hear.”

And now on to the truths that Gen Xers need to express and hear…

Meaning and Purpose

Cox starts by exploring the answer to the life, the universe and everything. “What’s the question?” “Why are we here?” He takes us through the work of Ernest Becker who wrote that we develop ‘projects’ to seek diversion from ourselves. The development of extreme sports, Cox writes, is an example of the Boomers’ death-denying projects of careerism and American dream being replaced by death-defying projects. Either way, we’re still left with the questions that we’ve been trying to avoid. Cox writes that we’ve been trying to find a sense of transcendence, running from our present reality in favour of another, by looking to a circle of projects: sexuality, spirituality, career personal fulfilment and relationships. It’s like a yacht sailing around in a pond, never likely to get to the open water.

Religion/Spirituality a Distracting Project?

I like Cox’s invitation to regard religion and spirituality with a healthy cynicism. In the discussion questions he asks: “Why is the supernatural or spirituality a sexy escape from one’s circle of projects? How might religion simply be an easy way for people to hide from their reality?” And yet I am uneasy about where he heads with this. The reader is led to give up attempts to engage with the divine and focus more on the human realm. This might fit a Lutheran sensibility but it doesn’t engage well with current interest in a spirituality that is both immanent and transcendent. Cox points out that we should be God’s project – rather than God being our project. It’s at this point that I would be exploring being God and humanity both involved in relationship as subject.

Relevance of Jesus

Kristoffer draws parallels between the experience of Gen Xers and the experience of Jesus. We feel discounted by those in control. Jesus was not taken seriously and was eventually mocked, tortured & executed. We’ve obviously inherited a terribly imperfect world. Our imperfect world is foundational to Christian understanding. We want relationships with depth and meaning. Jesus sought ‘real’ relationships, accepting people as they were. We are tired of prejudice and injustice against us and others. Jesus reached out to the unacceptable and desired equality for all.

Sacrificial Death

Cox takes us to the heart of Lutheran understanding of the gospel with a story told by Gerhard Forde in “The Work of Christ”, Christian Dogmatics.” A child is playing in the street. A truck is bearing down on the child. A man casts himself in the path of the truck, saves the child but is himself killed in the process. It is an accident. The man gave his life FOR the child, not to appease or make payment to driver of truck. Forde argues that we are like the driver of the truck. In the sacrifice of Jesus, God has saved us from ourselves. The one splattered against the front of our truck comes back to say ‘Shalom’, peace.

Dealing with bad stuff

A theology for Generation X does need to engage with the problems of pain, suffering, injustice and radical evil. In this context Cox introduces us to Ted Peters, whose book, “Sin – Radical Evil in Soul and Society” came out in 1994. Peters, a lecturer at Pacific Lutheran Theological Seminary, explores seven steps toward radical evil: anxiety, unfaith, pride, concupiscence, self-justification, cruelty, and blasphemy, before going on to unpack the power of forgiveness. Cox explores the social sin that develops when intergenerational rage is not dealt with. Here he draws on the work of James Gambone whose workshops help develop better relationships between generations. Gambone’s 1998 book, All Are Welcome: A Primer for Intentional Intergenerational Ministry and Dialogue, is out of print but can be bought secondhand at Amazon. Here’s a quote from James:

“The idea of promoting intergenerational respect, caring and cooperation offers a real alternative to the current secular self-interest, “we-they” attitudes. Wouldn’t our national dialogue on race, welfare reform and morality be significantly different if we first agreed to have the interests of all generations laid out clearly on the table?”

Cox goes on to explore the significance of baptism, the process of character development, dealing with ‘the old Adam’ and working through hypocrisy. So how does GenX and God fare? I’d be fascinated to hear from people who have used this book as an entry point into Christian faith. Cox helps GenX readers access a variety of thinkers, mostly from the Lutheran tradition. He provides continual opportunities for discussion, though I must say some of the questions are didactic in nature – twisting the reader around to the author’s point of view. In terms of theological reflection Cox has grappled with the issues he sees being raised for members of his generation. He attempts to line those issues up with the resources of the Lutheran tradition. He continually invites people to work through their own experience -finding new ways of expressing the call to be ‘saved by grace alone’. I wonder if Cox would be writing any differently now, after spending time as an Airforce Chaplain? He’s part of the Emerging Leaders Network, an organic missional friendship among native postmodern Lutheran leaders and other leaders open to “gettin’ busy with what God is doing in the postmodern world and emerging church”.

Book Details:

Author: Kristoffer Cox
Publisher: Tekna Books; 1st ed edition (September 1, 1998
)
ISBN: 0966441303

Review By: Duncan Mcleod is a Mission consultant for the Queensland Synod of the UCA. Duncan originally wrote this review over at his blog Postkiwi.

My Rating: 3 out of 5 stars

In January 2004 I wrote a brief review of PostMission: World mission by a postmodern generation, published by Paternoster Press, 2002. The book is the result of a roundtable conference of seventeen GenX mission leadersat ‘Holy Island Roundtable’, Lindisfarne Island in March 2001. They’ve published the book and continue a web presence. The seventeen included: Emma Hayes, Carolyn Cole, YWAM UK, Andy Crouch, The Regeneration Forum USA, Matt Gibbins and Paul Harris IVCF/Urbana, Joanne Goode Africa Inland Mission UK, Robin and Sarah Hay International Nepal Fellowship UK, Bevan and Marissa Herangi, Vaughn le Moss, Mark Orr International Teams Canada, Peter Stephenson WEC Spain UK, Henrik Sturve Nybygget/InterAct Sweden, Irene and Richard Tiplady Global Connections UK. The two older mentors for the roundtable were Bill and Yvonne Taylor WEF Missions Commission USA. Bevan Herangi, opens the book up with an exploration of Generation X values and their implications for mission organisations.

Flexibility and Freedom

Bevan writes about the desire to see work as a means to an end. “We work to live”. He sees a growing trend of paying others to do housework and gardening to free up time for other activity. Play and work tied together. Gen Xers are not tied to traditional expectations regarding gender, work and income. “I choose to preserve the things I love in life at the expense of not becoming rich”.

New experiences and positive change

Bevan points to the growing extreme sports industry and reality television as an indication of Gen Xers’ seach for new experiences. Gen Xers, he says, are keen to see things happen.

Doubt and Humility

Gen Xers, Herangi explains, are reluctant to show too much certainty about their abilities or the abilities of others. They are reluctant to receive up-front credit and prefer to work in teams. In cross-cultural situations they are reluctant to promote their own lifestyle to others.

Authenticity

Herangi says that Gen Xers must know the truth, even if it is painful. They listen for real-life stories of normal people from normal families. Many leave the church disillusioned because of the behaviour of fallen Christian leaders. Bevan cites the inspiring example of William Wallace at the end of Braveheart – refusing ‘mercy’ and choosing to stay with vision of freedom despite the cost.

Mentoring

Xers, Herangi says, are open to caring, one-on-one personal mentoring by stable secure people. They are open to receiving input, directions, accountability, in a transparent truth-telling environment. They are willing to receive advice from people who will share from their own experiences – both success & failures.

Distrust

Herangi picks up on the scepticism and cynicism of Gen Xers. Because of disappointment many Gen Xers are suspicious about promises about future, and consequently will not fully commit themselves to the schemes or vision of other people. They are cynical about ideologically driven agenda such as the continuation of the Cold War.

Tolerance and Diversity

Gen Xers, Herangi writes, tend to be more accepting of the views of others. The are open for suggestion on their own views. They see the need for many colours, not just black & white. They are not afraid to mix as equals with people of different cultures. They value the opportunity to share faith in two- way conversations that respect the opinions of the other person. Herangi concedes that Gen Xers can become indifferent to the impact of “un-Christian practices”.

Real leadership, not controlling authority

Gen Xers, Herangi writes, respond best to leaders who inspire through courage. He gives the examples of Peter Blake (NZ yachtsman) & Brother Andrew. They are cynical about leaders who sacrifice families and friends for the sake of their cause, or leaders who act as though their authority means ultimate lordship. Once again Herangi quotes from Braveheart: “Men don’t follow titles, they follow courage”.

Community and Sense of Belonging

Herangi writes about an awareness of the boundaries between neighbours in suburbs. Gen Xers choose small communities where people can be themselves rather than large communities where conformity is expected.

Implications

This list of values takes us to the heart of many points of contention between generations. Time and time again I’ve seen older leaders discount the contribution of emerging leaders, because of their lack of a driven work ethic. Likewise I’ve seen Gen Xers leaving churches in disgust as they see older leaders attempting to cover cracks in organisation or character. No doubt churches or mission organisations started by these emerging leaders will exhibit characteristics that seem strange to older leaders with more traditional values.

Book Details:

Title: PostMission: World Mission by a Postmodern Generation
Author: Richard Tiplady
Publisher: Paternoster Publishing (March, 2003)
ISBN: 1842271652

Review By: Duncan Mcleod is a Mission consultant for the Queensland Synod of the UCA. Duncan originally wrote this review over at his blog Postkiwi.

Duncan continues his review of this book in the posts “Post Mission Gen X Values” and “Postmission – world mission by a postmodern generation”

I have just read Andrew Root’s revisiting relational youth ministry. it really is an excellent book. if you teach youth ministry or are doing it or both i suggest you get a copy. his main argument/point/passion is that relationships are not a means to achieve an end goal. they are valuable in and of themselves. to make them about influence (i.e. a means to influence people) cheapens them. this may sound obvious when you say it but as he argues relational youth ministry is often guilty of being a means to an end.

Now i must diverge slightly at this point to clarify terms. relational youthwork in the uk has been a term that has been around for quite a while. there were some relational youthwork gatherings maybe 15 or 20 years ago that explored an approach to working with young people that were outside the reaches of the church – the terminology probably shifted to incarnational at a later stage. but this was all about being there alongside and with young people. this book would have been welcomed in those circles i am sure. but Andrew picks out some examples from California of what he sees as being called relational youth ministry that is this influence driven approach and it is something completely different. this is going to make this book complicated to cross the Atlantic which is a shame. the relational youthwork he describes has a very negative stance towards culture and it’s just worlds apart form what has been called relational here. in fact i couldn’t understand as a piece of research how he has got away with talking to just 5 youthworkers in one location to build his argument but i guess it was originally a phd or something. in the introduction he says he will show how incarnational ministry has been built from the pillars of cultural engagement…. etc but it badly needs some much more substantial research to carry more weight. it’s also a shame he doesn’t dialogue with the material written at that earlier time (e.g. the book called relational youthwork). all of that sounds a bit negative but it is important from a UK perspective.

But having said that the argument goes something like this…


(after two opening chapters tracing the historical development of relational youth ministry in the US that you might want to skim read if you are not in the US)

The evangelical world that youth ministry grew up in has a negative view of culture broadly speaking and part of the role of youth ministry in that world is to influence young people positively by modeling something different for them and persuading them to join an ‘in’ group by converting and finding their identity in that sub culture. relationships influence them in that direction. (Pete Ward’s insights about evangelical youth ministry running under the logic of safety – youth minister’s are employed to keep kids safe – has some parallels here) this has very little in fact to do with the incarnation even though the word incarnation gets used.

Root then uses Bonhoeffer (Bonhoeffer is really his only theological source) to suggest that the incarnation, crucifixion and resurrection of Christ could give a theological framework for understanding relational youth ministry as ‘place sharing’. god is already active and present in the world – we don’t need to relocate somewhere else to find god. relationships are the presence of god in the world – transcendent – rather than an end to a third thing. the goal is simply to be faithful to the humanity of the young person who is of course made in the image of god. the crucifixion means that we should follow Christ by being prepared to both suffer and share in the suffering of the young person. the resurrection means that in that encounter there is always the possibility for newness though it is not forced.

It reminded me of a quote that Cathy Ross used at grace last week on hospitality from Henri Nouwen:

Hospitality… means primarily the creation of a free space where the stranger can enter and become a friend instead of an enemy. Hospitality is not to change people, but to offer them space where change can take place.

So transformation is longed for, hoped for, prayed for – that we all become more human. but it is not forced on anyone…

There are some case studies/stories at the end that are helpful to show how this works and then a suggestion for how a church might develop a ministry that encourages adults and young people to develop these kind of relationships. Andrew himself has done one to one relational work with tough young people and the book seems to be born out of that experience. the skill to develop relationships of depth and trust and vulnerability is not an easy one and takes a maturity on the part of youth ministers.

Anyway it’s a good book even if the semantics are confusing for UK readers. i did find it a helpful challenge on what we mean when we describe ministry as incarnational – that patterning it on Jesus isn’t enough.
this is a typical blog post for me in that i have to write something quickly having read the book or i know I’ll never get round to it. but it could be a whole lot better (my review that is) if i took more time that i don’t have! i have just looked Andrew up to add a hyperlink above and realise we have met a few years back at an IASYM conference – great book Andrew if you read this…

I’d be interested to hear what anyone else thinks if you have read it…

Book Information:

Author: Andrew Root

Length: 221 pages

Size: 6 x 9 inches

Binding: paper

Published: October 2007

ISBN: 978-0-8308-3488-4

Link: Review written by Jonny Baker
Link: Book on InterVarsity Press

My Rating: 5 out of 5 stars